There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
