Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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