I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
