Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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