I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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