Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
