is your mom at the bar?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
