i permit you to call me
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize