i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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