How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Randomize
