woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
