The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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