can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize