About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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