what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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