She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
