belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just threw up on my dentist
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
