Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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