My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
