It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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