don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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