your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
