Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
