yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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