my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
His nipple licking is glorious
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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