that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
