Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
