that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize