This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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