real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
