if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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