So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize