its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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