PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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