Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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