def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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