he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize