We're like a lot better than the average bears
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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