Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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