At least make sure they are 18
Why
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize