Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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