I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize