I need help removing her.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
