Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
