let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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