I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I'm both gender and math confused
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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