I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
