i will never coherently bang her
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
