wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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