Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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