In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
