how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Randomize